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Reality Bites
By Darmeny Jones
Why do we love Reality TV?
“You’re fired!”
“The tribe has spoken.”
“Evidently fear is not a factor for you.”
“Gentlemen, there is only one rose remaining.”
“Off to the dog pound you go.”
These are popular statements from reality TV, those gems of modern entertainment that are so profitable to networks… and there are those who argue that they’re also profitable to society. Some say yes, others say no. Networks keep producing them because they are successful and very lucrative. Let’s look at the secret to success of reality TV, and what we can learn from it.
It all started with The Real World on MTV. From there it exploded, blossoming to include apprentice-wannabes being fired before the eyes of millions, Average Joe’s vying for the hand of a beauty, and intestine-eating couples competing for a small fortune. What has this world come to? It didn’t start with the Bachelor. That wasn’t the first “marriage as the prize” game show. It started, perhaps, with “Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?” One supposed multi-millionaire and one naďve debutante collided on national primetime TV in a well-publicized debacle that could well have been the beginning of the end for the reality TV industry.
Things got better from there, though, as producers and directors learned the secrets to a successful reality show:
The audience must be able to empathize with the characters. Everybody in the audience has to be able to relate to a character on a show. Take Average Joe for example. Who hasn’t rooted for the underdog? Americans watch this show and find themselves rooting for the guy that doesn’t have it all. We root for the guy that looks more like ourselves. I mean, how many of us can consider ourselves supermodels, famous actors, or in the very highest echelon of the gene pool?
Someone must make a fool of themselves. We as a society love to laugh at each other. We enjoy sitting at home on the couch saying, “I can’t believe someone told this girl that she can sing.” We love listening to people say the things that we’re thinking, but aren’t bold enough to say ourselves. And there's another aspect of this, which is all-American. Shows like The Bachelor and For Love or Money exist for one reason only, and that's to humiliate really good-looking people. As negative as it is to admit, I’d submit that that's a naturally all-American concept. I mean, as far as the beautiful women on "Joe Millionaire" are concerned, most women hate them because they're beautiful and thin. And many men might hate those women, too, because they've had their hearts broken at one time or another by a beautiful woman. So why not indulge that American desire for revenge on people who are popular and great looking? Morality aside, that’s popular TV.
The dream and desire of large prizes and money should be there (motivation). “Here’s an idea. Why don’t you eat the most rancid, disgusting thing that we can find? That is, eat it after we have you do some extremely physical, dangerous stunt that could get you hurt. Do all that and we’ll give you $50,000.” It’s amazing what people will do for money. If the amount is right, you can get someone to do almost anything. That’s everything from having the world decide what you do everyday by voting on the Internet, to answering trivia questions while running on a treadmill suspended 25 feet over a swimming pool. Every major network has launched some type of reality television program with money or a lucrative contract as the prize. Some of the winners have become American Idols and others have fallen into oblivion. It’s a Pavlov-like response. Tell the public there is a monetary prize and television exposure, and you can get them to do anything. Wonder what that says about us?
Competition Whatever happened to, “it’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game”? Somehow half the public didn’t get that memo. People will do whatever they can to win. I’ve seen everything from forming backdoor alliances to savagely sabotaging others, and you probably have, too. It’s clear that the desire to win outweighs the consequences of perception of your actions. I remember when it was a big deal that people would wait outside for 12 hours before a movie debuted. Now it’s a competition to see who can camp out the longest prior to the movie! A lot of them don’t even really care about the movie; they care more about the competition. I must admit, though, there is nothing like a good competition. That’s probably why so many of us are hooked on reality TV. Pick your pony and ride it to the championship.
Conflict and/or drama (love interests or internal hatred). What’s a good TV show without a little drama? Soap operas figured this out a long time ago. If you create conflict on the screen, people get hooked in. The only difference is that on reality TV it’s not scripted. What do you expect to happen when you put highly competitive people together, all vying for the same prize? You get physical altercations, verbal tongue-lashings, and late-night teary confessions of wrongdoings. Now, with every bit of drama there must be a diabolical twist. The twist is the point in the show when the producers do something that is absolutely unexpected that takes everyone for a loop. Great shows have a twist that gets audiences on the edge of their seats. All of these together make for high anticipation and even higher ratings.
Consider the shows we are watching. We wonder why we have such a high divorce rate as a society when we have game shows where the ultimate prize is marriage to a “complete stranger.” I read something pretty profound the other day. Michael Medved stated, “The real problem in America, though, isn’t so much the low quality of TV, it’s the high quantity of TV. People watch too much altogether.” We complain about all the bad things that happen like the Britney Spears/Madonna incident on the MTV Video Awards, and the Janet Jackson/Justin Timberlake incident at the Super Bowl Halftime Show, yet ratings on these events are higher than they have ever been. Yes, we have a few in society complaining about what is being shown and threatening to boycott, but on the other hand the rest of America is gleefully watching.
And what can we learn from all this for use in our daily lives? Let’s take it from the top:
- Audiences want to empathize with characters. So if you’re managing a team, or trying to persuade a friend, boss, or co-worker, or giving a speech, one of the most effective routes is empathy. To paraphrase a certain ex-president, “feel their pain” and they’ll rally to your cause.
- We enjoy watching comedy, even people making fools of themselves. So never underestimate the power of humor in your daily life.
- You’ve got to motivate people to keep them interested… in you, in a team’s goals, in an organization’s endeavors. Without motivation, nobody has any reason to chip in and help out.
- We enjoy competition… sometimes even when we shouldn’t. A fun game or a competitive contest is a great way to motive your teammates and reward your high achievers.
- And finally, while conflict can be extremely interesting… the only people who usually benefit from a spectacle are the spectators. For effective group work, conflict should be kept civil, like a debate. Otherwise, your effectiveness is going to be seriously hampered.
This all adds up to great, intriguing TV… and a few good lessons for our personal and work lives, too. As much as we hate it, we can’t stop watching. It’s a recipe for success, but with that success it also breeds dysfunctional behaviors. We wonder why some things happen. It’s probably because we have created bad karma. That’s got to be true cause my Mom always told me that you reap what you sow. Sow wild and dysfunctional behavior, reap TV as we currently have it. However, if you put all these secrets together it can add up to greatness.
Darmeny Jones, known as "The Emperor of Energy," is a Senior Trainer with TRI and a frequent contributor to the Leadership Solutions Network. Click here to learn more about Darmeny and how to contact him!
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